Do You Know What Happens When a Morlock Gets Hit By Lightning? (Major X3 Spoilers Contained Within)

Apparently you get a really crappy X-Men movie. I had fully intended to give my review of this movie both a geek and non-geek perspective, but my inner geek is so pissed off that it won’t let my inner non-geek have any say at all. My inner non-geek has been bound and gagged and thrown down the storm cellar. That is how pissed off X-Men 3: the Last Stand made her. She’s gone homicidal. Well, maybe it’s just felonious assault and wrongful imprisonment. That said, I don’t think I can actually work up an actual review, so what follows is a list of things that pissed me off and the much smaller list of things I actually liked.

Warning: Major spoilers follow, so don’t continue reading if you haven’t see the movie yet. And if you haven’t seen the movie yet, please come back when you do and let me know what you think, especially if you can come up with a reason for me to not hate this movie. Anyway, here we go:


Things That Pissed Me Off:

• Halle Berry as Storm – this has been a consistent problem with all the X-Men films, but I think it bears repeating.
• It was even more about Wolverine than usual – he even managed to co-opt Cyclops’s grief. Wolverine is apparently the Lana Lang of the X-Men. Also, he cried a lot in this movie. It was very jarring.
• The fact that they turned the Dark Phoenix into little more than Magneto’s thug. Remember how lame they made Bane in Batman & Robin, just standing behind Poison Ivy all the time? That’s pretty much what Dark Phoenix did for most of the movie.
  It’s the Dark Phoenix Saga, but we don’t get to see the Phoenix Force once. She’s just a chick in an ugly red outfit that apparently commands some really fierce winds. Dark Phoenix was completely unimpressive.
• The pointless Rogue/Bobby/Kittie love triangle. I know they read Astonishing X-Men. How could they not realize that Kittie and Piotr are OMG!Meant2B4Eva!? Also, it was just shoehorned in there for pointless teen angst melodrama.
• The fact that they made Juggernaut a mutant and the fact that he looked really fucking awful. What they hell were they thinking when the let that helmet make it on screen?
• Wolverine not asking about Cyclops until after almost having sex with Jean on the exam table. I just love how he and Storm just completely ignored the fact that Cyclops was just gone. His visor is floating around and nobody cares. That’s teamwork people.
• Speaking of teamwork – it seems that someone needs to explaining what it is to Storm, because the Fastball Special is indeed teamwork.
• Uhg! The Sentinel in the Danger Room sequence. First of all, I don’t buy that Wolverine could take out a Sentinel all by himself, at least not that quickly. Second of all, it looked like crap.
• They made Psylocke and Multiple Man villains, and they didn’t even have the decency to let us see Psylocke’s psi-blade.
• How unceremoniously they killed of Cyclops. I don’t know whether to blame FOX and their spiteful ways, or Halle Berry and her insistence on having a bigger role in this installment if she was going to come back. I’m inclined to blame them all and hate them equally.
• The slightly less, but still unceremonious killing of Professor Xavier. Having Wolverine fall to his knees crying did not make it a dramatic moment. It just made it funny.
• The fact that they took away all of Professor Xavier’s ethics. Putting up mental blocks in Jean’s mind? Setting up shop in someone else’s body? So wrong. I know Xavier acts like a douchebag in the comic books now, but it has been earned and developed over years. The Xavier of this movie apparently never thought anything of playing around in other people’s heads. He’s why people are anti-mutant.
• Did Storm kill Callisto? Why not? Apparently none of the ideals of the X-Men have any meaning in this movie anyway. In the comic books, Storm defeated Callisto without her powers and refused to kill her, even though it was technically a battle to the death for control of the Morlocks (which Storm needed to win in order to save the lives of her fellow X-Men). It was Storm’s defining moment, and established her as truly worthy to lead the X-Men. This movie just insisted on making a mockery of all the great X-Men moments though. Why should Storm come off any better? She’s already being played by Halle Berry.
• Rogue taking the mutant cure. What the fuck? For the sake of their stupid Dawson’s Creek subplot? Bullshit!
• Beast using the mutant cure on Magneto. I assume this was the plan that they worked out as a team. So as a team, Storm, Beast, and Wolverine decided to go against everything Xavier stood for and for the cure on someone?
• Jean Grey does not have a split personality. She is possessed by the Phoenix Force. Jean Grey is not just some crazy freak. And in the end, they even take a way her moment of self sacrifice to once again make it all about Wolverine. I hated that the most. Maybe. No, I still hated them killing Cyclops the most. The character assassination of Jean Grey comes in second.

Things I Actually Liked:

• Angel – When he was flying he looked good, and the character was true to form. Warren is a rich kid, dearly loves to fly and would never give up that freedom, and he even got to have an unperverted hero moment hero moment when he saved his father.
• Kittie Pryde – I thought the actress was pretty good and the characterization, what little there was of it, was good too. Don’t know about her calling Juggernaut a dickhead though.
• Leech – I just liked that they even mentioned him, let alone had him in the movie.
• Beast – Kelsey Grammer was great. And they had him say “Oh my stars and garters.” That made the geek in me smile. I also thought it looked really great when he was fighting. It was all very Beast-like. And Wolvie called him furball too, which I also liked a lot.
• The Fastball Special
• Bobby getting all iced up – it looked like crap, but after 3 movies, it was about damn time we got to see Iceman really be Iceman.
• When Wolverine was fighting that guy whose arms kept growing back, and then he just kicked him in the groin and said “Grow those back.” Heh. That was Wolverine.
• The fact that they killed Cyclops so early in the movie – yes it’s my most hated thing about the movie, but the fact that he died so early meant that they couldn’t have him do something completely out of character like join Magneto or something. I really think they would have done that.
• I suppose it was a good summer popcorn flick if you didn’t care about any of the characters or the stories the movie was supposedly based on.

OK, so did I miss anything? Is there good stuff I overlooked? Is there bad stuff I blocked out? Am I completely off? Let me know what you think.

A Friendly Service Reminder

I a still planning on posting my opinions on the season finales of both Veronica Mars and Smallville. I was just waiting until I had a chance to watch them both again. The Veronica Mars finale I wanted to watch again, because it is hard to digest everything and form an opinion on the first viewing. The Smallville finale I wanted to watch again because I hope it will be better the second time around.

I also just realize that I never commented on the Supernatural finale, which I had intended to do. I've decided it's too late for that now, but I do want to say just one thing about it. And that is: NO! Not the Metallicar... Seriously, the Winchester Boys without their Impala is like Michael Knight without KITT.

Finally, since this entry is all about shows on the future CW, what was up with all the beards? I think the Smallville boys (2 current and 1 former) must have made some sort of pact, or maybe it has something to do beiong stuck up in Vancouver. I like Tom Welling's the best. He looks like the prettiest lumberjack ever.

I just wanted to add that I also have a pretty big Spider-Man rant that's been brewing for a while, so that's going to be coming up. And I hope to see X-Men 3 this weekend, so I plan on getting a review (or rant) up fot that. I'm going to be out of town for the long weekend, so I probably won't get to any of this before net week though. Expect the X3 review to be my next update (unless I don't get to see the movie), since I will try to get that up on Monday night. If I wait to long, I might have forget the details, and then I'll have to see it again. If the movie is what I expect it to be, I really don't want to give FOX my money twice.

A Farewell to the Wigs, the Accents, and the Rubber Dresses

Last night, the final to episodes of Alias aired, and while I do think it was the right time for it to end, I am sorry to see it go. I didn't think season 4 was very good, but in season 5 it really had its legs back. I was hesitant at first. Killing Vaughn off in the first episode and then adding a whole bunch of new characters did not sit well with me. But once everyone settled in, and I felt certain that Vaugn wasn't really dead, I was able to sit back an enjoy the ride. (Yes, my enjoyment was contingent on Michael Vaughn being alive. I am a girl and I have a crush on Michael Vartan.) One of my favorite shows of all time was back to what it should be.

And now it's gone...

Overrall, I would say it was a satisfying end. Several months ago, I had said that if Alias didn't end with Sydney, Vaughn and the baby walking along a beach somewhere, I would be very upset. The producers did me one better, but I will get to that later. In addition to being satisfied that Sydney got the happy ending she had earned, I thought that they did a very good job of tying things up in the end. I had actually predicted back in season 1, when they met the guy in Italy about the Rambaldi clock, the Rambaldi's end game was some sort of secret to eternal life. It's kind of cool that I was right, but I think a lot of people saw that coming.

One of the things I liked best about the first part was how they spread the moments around between the characters, Marshall especially got his moment to shine, which I thought was due to the character. I also really loved that over the course of the last half of this season, we got to see all our old favorite characters. When I had initially heard that Merrin Dungay would be guest starring, I assumed they had found a way to bring back Evil Francie again. I was pleasantly surprised to see original Good Francie in flashback. I was also surprised that I got a little choked up when Tom died. I do think that, had the show gone on, I really might have grown to love Rachel and Tom. In the first half of the season, I felt that Rachel was being forced down out throats a bit too much, and that they were trying too hard to make Rachel and Tom the new Sydney and Vaughn. But in the second half of the season, I think they fit in more organically, and in the past couple of episodes, I had really grown invested in the nascent relationship. For that reason, I found their goodbye touching and nicely understated.

The second part was the really heartbreaking part though. Even though I expected it, I was still a little shocked to see Jack get shot in the chest, and was thrilled to see Sydney lash out at Sloane and shoot him seven times. The moment I completely lost it though was during Jack's speech to Sydney. It was so touching and a little inspiring. "Nobody else in the world can do what you can do," he told her, and you knew he meant that she was just that extraordinary, and not because of any Rambaldi prophesy. He just loves her so much, and with all the flashbacks in this episode, I was reminded of how Sydney's relationship with her father had evolved since the first episode. It was so strained then, but by the end, she really was daddy's little girl.

The flashbacks to different points in Syd's life, showing how she became a spy, were wonderful as well. I loved seeing that Sydney was exactly who she was meant to be. They did white wash the fact that Jack used Project Christmas to condition her to be a spy, but since we had already known that she had solved that puzzle before he put her in the program, I'm more than willing to let that go. When we had initially found out about that, Jack told her that he had done it to protect her, and that makes perfect sense to me. Project Christmas was just another step towards her becoming the hero she needed to be. Also, I thought the scene when she told Jack about her job with Credit Dauphin, was interesting. We had already known that he had hoped to recruit Sydney into the real CIA, but Sloane had gotten to her first.

I was glad that in Sydney's final confrontation with her mother she showed compassion to the very end, always willing to give Irina the chance to turn back from her obsession. Seeing Sydney completely give up on her mother would have been too disheartening. Sydney had been willing to trust her mother at every opportunity since season 2. One of her defining characteristics was her constant need for her mother's love. And I think it's telling that earlier in the episode, Jack had admitted to Dixon that he was wrong about Sloan. As badass as Jack is, I think it's hard for him to give up on the people he loves, whether they be family or friends. I think Sydney inherited that from Jack, as we have seen them both make mistakes with trust in regard to both Sloan and Irina. As nice as it was to see that Sydney hadn't grown so cold that she could wouldn't try to save Irina, it was awesome to see what Jack did to Sloan. Jack had made mistakes, mistakes that indirectly caused a lot pain to Sydney, but he wasn't going to leave this world without doing what he could to make sure that he saves Sydney from further pain. The best line of the night: "You could beat death, Arvin, but you couldn't beat me."

Now for the end, I loved it. I do think that Sydney and Vaughn earned their happily ever after with their little family (and I have never been the type of person who needed for stories to end happily), but I loved the fact that Sydney never really gave up the spy game. It's who she is, and the fact that Isabelle takes after her mother seemed only natural to me. I'll miss Sydney Bristow, as I still miss Buffy Summers, but I am more than satisfied with the way Alias ended. And at least I still have Veronica Mars, so I'm not left without any of my favorite television heroines.

Enthusiasm Waning

I finally got around to watching the X-Men clip that aired on Fox last Thursday night (you can tell how excited I was to see it). It’s amazing how everything I see with regard to this movie just makes me less enthusiastic about it. First there was the clip I got from YouTube, which was just terrible. Even Wolverine was bad in it, and he’s the one character they have always gotten right. (I think Jackman is holding back, saving the goods for when he gets his own movie.) And I pretty much officially hate Halle Berry now. She is so not Storm. The Sentinel looked awful. The dialogue was atrocious. In general, it just didn’t look good. At least it had the Cannonball Special, though. That filled me with fangirl glee.

But on to the Fox clip. The worst thing about it was that it just wasn’t all that exciting. And no one really looks all that good. Beast should be furrier. Warren should be more handsome. Juggernaut should not make me laugh. The whole scene where the mutants are having a meeting to discuss the cure and Magneto gets up and makes a big speech just looked cheesy. It just looked so…phony street urchin or something. Remember how crazy the gangs in The Warriors looked? I got that kind of vibe from the assorted mutants, except instead of brightly colored spandex, it was just variations on black. If they are not going to be wearing their costumes, just let them dress like normal people. I couldn’t even figure out who any of them were supposed to be. Also, the whole thing just really lacked a certain cinematic quality. I thought it should have an epic feel, but it just seemed to be lacking. Hopefully it will look better on the big screen.

Another problem I have with the whole thing is the plot. I just can’t get excited about the mutant cure when not too long ago, Joss Whedon dealt with that topic in Astonishing X-Men. And he did it brilliantly. I know that’s not the only mutant cure storyline, but it’s the one I’m familiar with, and it’s the most recent, so it’s what this film has to live up to. Are Brett Rattner and the writers up to the task of matching on film what Joss Whedon and John Cassaday were able to do in the comic books?

Finally, Comics Continuum has an interview with James Marsden, aka Cyclops. There’s some interesting stuff about the character. I’m not sure about the “role reversal” between Scott and Logan in the movie, but since Scott is grieving for his wife (get used to it buddy), I’m keeping an open mind. Technically, he should be married to some chick that looks just like Jean and living in Alaska, but I don’t think we’ll be seeing that. What worries me is that they say “Cyclops is featured heavily early in X-Men: The Last Stand.” What happens to him for the rest of the movie?

Speaking of Cyclops, something else that bothered me about the clip that aired on Fox, was Wolverine trying to be the sensitive one talking to Cyclops about Jean’s death. They tried that at the end of X2 also, and it didn’t work then. And Logan just says wholly inappropriate things, like “Maybe it’s time for us to move on.” The guy who has a thing for the grieving husbands dead wife does not get to use the word “us” when referring to their grieving process. I mean, how obnoxious is that to remind a guy that while his wife was a live, you were constantly trying to put the moves on her?

All that said, I'm still going to see it opening weekend.

A World Without Heroes

Last night was the second part of the two part series finale of Justice League Unlimited. The title of this blog entry is a tribut to that. (Also, I wanted to try and have the title of my blog keep the referencing in line with the references in the episode titles. Points for getting the connection.) I waited until after both parts to post my notes on the episodes, so watch out, this is a long one.

“Alive” began with Lex Luthor once again trying to reunite with Brainiac. “I’m going to be a god again.” Lex Luthor is so badass. How cool was it that he reconfigured Grodd’s cloaking device into a hyper spatial drive? Now the headquarters is as awesome as the Legion of Doom headquarters I grew up with.

Tala – hell hath no fury like a witchy woman scorned for an alien computer. Figures she’d go running back to Grodd, but did anybody think Grodd was actually a match for Luthor? No way.

I loved seeing all the Society members duke it out. That was one of the best battles I have ever scene on this show. Toyman totally creeps me out, and I think Killer Frost is freaking cool (no pun intended). But the showdown between Luthor and Grodd was the best, with Lex showing that he is always 10 steps ahead. After Lex gets the upper hand, somehow counteracting Grodd’s mind control powers and using them against him, Lex traps him in an airlock, where they share this exchange:

“Goodbye Grodd. It could’ve gone the other way.”
“It really could have, couldn’t it?”
“No, but why speak ill of the dead?”

And then Lex has Grodd sucked out into space. Too cool. After that, he finally finds a good use for Tala. “I’m a sick person too.” Yeah he is.

Gayest line of the night: “Brainiac, I’m coming!” The look on his face is so euphoric too. The writers? They are totally going there intentionally.

Sadly, Lex did not get to reunite with Brainiac. Instead, when the reconstitution was said and done , there stood…Darkseid. Hells yeah.

Finally, I think it’s safe to say that “We have a little problem,” is the most intriguing line ever uttered on this show. The League and the Society team up. Superman and Lex Luthor fighting side by side. The week of waiting was agony. So was the wait worth it?

You betcha. “Destroyer” managed to out do “Alive” on every level, which had to be a tough thing to accomplish.

Lex Luthor: “Darkseid took Brainiac away from me. I can’t hear his voice in my head anymore.”
Superman: “Oh come on. It’s Lex flippin’ Luthor! Why should we trust him?”
Lex Luthor: “Let’s be clear about this. We’re not here to help you save the world. You’re here to help me get revenge on Darkseid. When this is over, it’s back to business as usual.”
Superman: “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

OK, so we didn’t get Lex Luthor and Superman fighting side by side. We got Lex Luthor and Batman fighting side by side, which is nearly as good. And since Superman was pretty tied up in the awesome fight against Darkseid, I’m more than happy for how it worked out.

A great rescue is always exciting, but somehow, superheroes always seem to come off as even more superhero-y when they are saving the bad guys. Not just anyone would jump off a building to save a guy like Lex Luthor. Batman? He does it without even thinking about it. I love that.

Actually, I loved that even though this was predominantly a Superman and Lex Luthor episode, with a heavy side of Batman, a lot of characters got to show off their stuff in the big battle. Naturally, the original seven all got big moments. I think my favorite had to be the return of Jonn J’Onzz to the fold. His dragon was very cool, and I loved Wonder Woman’s reaction to seeing him again. It was a rare look at the innocence of the character, which we haven’t really seen on Justice League Unlimited. Mostly she’s just an awesome warrior type and leader, which is very cool too.

Also, I know I normally gush about Lex Luthor and The Flash. Superman has never really been my favorite character, but sometimes I just really love him. This monologue that he gave while beating the crap out of Darkseid just really showed why Superman is the best of the best: “Batman won’t quit as long as he can still draw a breath. None of my teammates will. Me? I’ve got a different problem. I feel like I live in a world made of cardboard. Always taking constant care not to break something…to break someone. Never allowing myself to lose control, even for a moment or someone could die. But you can take it. Can’t you big man? What we have here is a rare opportunity for me to cut loose and show you just how powerful I really am.” I can’t even begin to argue why he shouldn’t be the most revered superhero character after that entire scene.

Still, I have to wonder how Metropolis is going to pay for all those repairs. Also, Darkseid still beat him, but he was totally cheating. Fortunately, the Metron had shown up to bring Lex to what they need to defeat Darkseid. I loved Lex’s supreme hubris in this exchange:

Metron: “I have to warn you. Only a twelfth level intellect has the slightest hope of surviving what you are about to experience.”
Lex Luthor: “Then I’m over qualified.”

The anti-life equation – I don’t get it. What happened there? I do appreciate that Lex went to go put on his “power suit” before saving the day though. You want to look good at a time like that. I think it was interesting that Superman’s perspective was that Lex “died” (have to agree with all the other Leaguers, no way Luthor and Darkseid really died) saving the world. Lex had made it clear from the beginning that he was in it because he blamed Darkseid for the loss of Brainiac and wanted revenge. Lex really is that selfish. And yet, I really don’t think Lex would want the world to come to an end. He just had his sites set on bigger things – like everything everywhere – and Darkseid took that away. So for Lex, Darkseid’s crime was bigger than wanting to take over Earth.

The end was great though. What are a bunch of superheroes supposed to do when they are faced with having to deal with a bunch of criminals who just helped them fight off invasion forces from Apokolips? Give them a five minute head start of course. (How cute was it that Giganta ran up to kiss Flash before taking advantage of her head start?) Most fittingly, the last three lines of the episode, and therefore the series, were said by the big three:

Superman: “A head start. You’re getting soft in your old age.”
Batman: “Don’t you have a tall building to go leap?”
Wonder Woman: “And the adventure continues.”

The final shot of Justice League Unlimited is the Leaguers chasing after the Society members, ending with a close up of the Bat symbol on Batman’s chest, which is so perfect since Batman: the Animated Series is where Bruce Timm’s whole universe began. It’s just too bad this is the end.

Veronica Mars 2.21

Well, I finally got to see last week's Veronica Mars on Sunday (stupid Nets), and I wanted to comment on it before tonight's season finale. So here goes:

1. I was kind of disappointed that they went to the crazy veteran well with Lucky, but I think it's pretty clear that Lucky's brand of crazy was from something entirely different than war related reasons. I did find his shoot out (well, not really) of the school was pretty scary (sing-songing Gia's name to the Chia Pet jingle is just creepy) and I liked that we got some hero moments from Veronica and Wallace. I even thought it was pretty brave of Jackie to even attempt to call the police. I was surprised that school security guards get to carry guns, with actual bullets instead of those rubber things though. That's pretty good for the security guards -- all the power of being a cop without the pesky training and background checks.

2. I think Jackie is this season's Logan. We started out the season hating her, then we learned more about her and just couldn't help but feel for her. She has a lot of issues, especially of the daddy variety (just like Logan), but she really is a good person. Actually, Jackie never even did anything anywhere near as bad as the stuff Logan did, and often continues to do, so the only thing she really had to overcome was general obnoxiousness. I guess it stands to reason, though that she wouldn't be as bad as Logan since her dad isn't as bad as Aaron Echolls (more on him later). Jackie has also proven herself to have integrity, so I guess she's better than Logan on that front too. Still, I maintain that she is like Logan in that our attitudes have changed toward her. Sure, she hasn't won everyone over, but even Logan has his detractors. Also, I was just as hard on Tessa Harper as everyone else when the season started, but I really do think that she has put in some really top notch performances in the second half f the season.

3. It says a lot about a show that it can make the audience feel heartbroken over a character getting caught for orchestrating another character's death. Poor Weevil. I really think he had the intention of getting his life straightened out, and e was going to start by actually graduating. I have a feeling his situation isn't going to get resolved in the next episode, so I really hope that Veronica finds a way to get him off the hook next season. After all, it was the Fitzpatricks who technically killed Thumper, not Weevil.

4. I am totally back to loving Beaver and Mac together. They must hook up again. I want that relationship to continue for a long time. Now tat Bright and Hannah are broken up on Everwood (sniffle), they are the cutest couple on TV. I'm worried though. The Beaver and Kendall Casablancas Phoenix Trust storyline is still unresolved and I have a horrible feeling something bad will come of it. Now that we know Kendall is a lot more on the ball than she originally seemed, I can't help but wonder if she might not be able to get the upper hand on little Beav. I don't think that would lead to good things for my favorite pair's future.

5. Apparently, the guy standing next to Beaver, when Veronica found him staring at "Amber is a bitch" scratched into is car door, who told Veronica he hadn't said a word to anybody was the kid who caught Lynn Echolls's suicide on film last season. Is this just a really random callback, or will that prove to be significant in tonight's episode? You never know with this show.

6. I was hoping for a bit more Veronica and Logan interaction in this episode. I still don't think Logan's good enough for our Veronica (he still does some pretty reprehensible things, after all) but his drunken "epic love" speech from the previous episode made me into a 'shipper, even if I know that feeling won't last. It's interesting that they have set up two similar romantic situations for Veronica. If you will recall, the fortune Duncan gave to Veronica was revealed to say "True love stories never end." Then you have Logan describing their love as epic. And then there is Veronica's reaction to both. She clearly wanted to believe the fortune, but she was also receptive to Logan's words. Who does she really prefer? I doubt she knows, but I think Logan is going to be around for the long haul and I would be really surprised if Duncan doesn't pop up every once in a while. Then again, if Duncan gave her an STD, that might cut him out of the picture completely. Then again, the fact that Aaron Echolls's attorney knew about Veronica's STD kind of puts that whole thing in question. How did the lawyer fid out about it?

7. The revelation that Woody Goodman is a child molester is a non-shocker, but I still wonder where that is going. Since we found out about it now, I'm certain that he did not cause the bus crash. However, I wonder if he is going to face justice at all. He did take off in this episode and, given the Echolls verdict, I wouldn't be surprised if he turns out to be the Michael Jackson to Aaron's O.J. Also, remember when Beaver ad Mac initially broke up? I wondered if there was some deeper reason for him not wanting to have sex with her. Now we have a child molester in the mix and we know that he's been coaching little league for years. I can't help but wonder if Beaver Casablancas is going to play a part in all of that. Also, the email with the recording of the guys talking about what Goodman did to them was not from one of the email aliases on the list that Keith gave Veronica, which makes me wonder where it did come from nd who the third, and unheard, voice was.

8. I was actually shocked by the verdict though. I could not believe Aaron Echolls got acquitted, and yet, of course he got acquitted. What celebrity actually gets convicted of murder? It was absolutely the realistic ending and I should have expected nothing less. Poor Logan. You know Aaron is going to make him pay for this. And I'm sure he's got some payback in store for Veronica as well, but she's able to handle herself much better. She also has Keith. I wonder if Aaron Echolls is going to be sticking around for a while, or if the finale will find him paying a less than legal price for his crimes. Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if someone killed him, but I also wouldn't be surprised if they kept him around to torment Logan and the Marses whenever they got a little too comfy.

There are still so many balls left in the air and only one episode left. How many of the still unresolved plot points will be dealt with and how many will be left open for next season (assuming there will be one)? By this time last season, I knew exactly who killed Lilly Kane. This season, I have no idea what the resolution to the big mystery is. Fortunately, the Nets are off tonight, so I get to watch the finale at the same time as everyone else. I cannot wait.

The Power of Christ Compels You

My brain works in a very unusual way, and one of the unfortunate side effects of that is that once and actor plays Jesus, I can't let it go. In some way, that actor will alwys be Jesus to me, but there have been so many Jesus movies, it's hard to keep them all straight. That is why I have come up with Jesus related nicknames for the various actors who have played Jesus over the years. And since I am at work, and bored, I will share those nicknames with you now. It's just too bad I didn't do this for Easter. It would have been so much more appropriate.

Nickname: Captain Jesus

Actor: Jeffrey Hunter

Film: King of Kings

Explanation: He also played Captain Christopher Pike on Star Trek

Nickname: Jesus the Merciless

Actor: Max von Sydow

Film: The Greatest Story Ever Told

Explanation: He also played Ming the Merciless

Nickname: Sexy Jesus

Actor: Willem Dafoe

Film: The Last Temptation of Christ

Explanation: He's the only Jesus I know that had sex. Also, Willem Dafoe can be pretty sexy.

Nickname: Crazy Jesus

Actor: Jeremy Sisto

Film: Jesus

Explanation: If you ever watched Six Feet Under, then it's pretty obvious.

Nickname: Gay Jesus

Actor: Christian Bale

Film: Mary, Mother of Jesus

Explanation: You don't easily forget the sight of Obi Wan Kenobi buggering Jesus.

Alternative Nicknames: BatJesus, Psycho Jesus and Skinny Jesus

Nickname: Clay Jesus

Actor: Ralph Fiennes

Film: The Miracle Maker

Explanation: He provided the voice for a claymaion Jesus. It was cheesy and awesome.

Alternative Nickname: Nazi Jesus (there could be many others, but since he only provided the voice for Jesus, I don't think he deserves more than two).

Nickname: Hunky Jesus

Actor: James Caviezel

Film: Like you don't already know wat it is

Explanation: I cannot take credit for this nickname. It comes from a Vanity Fair editorial that, among some very good points about why this film was socially problematic, claimed that Mel Gibson was trying to convert people with his hunk Jesus. (James Caviezel is pretty hot.) It amused the hell out of me, but more than that, it inspired me to go around nicknaming the Jesuses.

So what do you think? Am I missing anyone? Are my nicknames fair and accurate? Let me know.

Long Time No Post

Ah, it's been so long since I have posted an entry. It's good to be back. I have so many things I want to talk about, but tonight I just have some brief comments on some noteworthy stuff.

Like this. I would so buy that if it just had Fray on it, but how sweet is it that she and her scythe are front and center? Fray is so cool.

How fucking awesome was Astonishing X-Men #14? I know I am a complete Joss Whedon fangirl, but you have to admit that he has these characters down cold. You also have to admit that he is just an incredible good writer. I'll admit it, I was a bit shocked at the end, even though I know I totally shouldn't have been. Also, I love Cyclops, but sometimes people don't give him the respect he deserves as a character. (Just look at the way the X-Men movies have treated him. And I know it's been years since I read a non-Astonishing X-title, but the last time I did they certainly didn't write for the character.) Whedon totally gets how, messed up and interesting he is, so that kind of makes me love Whedon all the more. Also, I'm really looking forward to the inevitable Kittie/Emma showdown. You know it's coming, and I have a sneaky suspicion that Emma is counting on it. Remember in the first or second issue when Emma told Kittie she chose her for the team? Emma wanted someone who absolutely wouldn't trust her there.

Speaking of people I love, Drew Goddard (former Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel writer) wrote a pretty darn great 100th episode of Alias, which featured some of my favorite recurring characters: Kelly Peyton, Anna Espinoza (played by other Whedonverse alumni Amy Acker and Gina Torres respectively) and especially Will Tippen! Awww Will. I've missed you. It was so great to see Sydney and Will together again. It been so long since she's had a real friend and their friendship is just adorable. Also adorable was all the baby stuff. How is anyone going to settle for anything less than a CIA babysitter now? Anybody who has a small child needs to babyproof with explosive scanners. They need to start selling those in Babies R Us. Jack was also adorable. I loved his "You can't have sharp edged weapons lying around small children...especially young Bristow women" line. Apparently, skills with weaponry is an inborn trait with those Bristows. I'm not surprised. I'm glad we got confirmation that Jack and Sydney are behind Vaughn's Tibetan rehabilitation holiday, but it would have been nice to see Vaughn too. Lastly, the end was shocking. I really did not see that coming, even though with the title of the episode being "There's Only One Sydney Bristow" I really should have. I'm looking forward to an awesome doppleganger fight scene in the finale.

Did anyone else watch Smallville tonight? I really think the powers that be on that show want me to hate Clark. I really do. He was all mature and likeable for two weeks, but that just couldn't last. No, he's got to go back to whiney little bitch mode. Other than that, not bad for a generic freak of the week episode, and I'm actually liking Lex and Lana together. He's totally just telling her whatever she wants to hear and she's falling for it. Lex may be the first man Lana hasn't been able to completely castrate merely by association. Maybe he will turn out to be a good supervillain.

Someone else I love is J.J. Abrams. Not only did he create Alias which is back to being awesome (unfortunately just in time to end), but he's reviving the Star Trek franchise. How unbelievably cool is that? The only down side to this is that I will now be wasting hours and hours trying to think of who should play young Kirk and Spock. Seriously, I won't be able to think of anything else. Anyone got any suggestions? You'd be helping me out if you could give me some good ones.

Finally, I hate the Nets. Haaaaate! Because of them and the stupid NBA playoffs, I still have not seen Veronica Mars. And I won't get to see it until Sunday. Sunday! Was it good? Don't tell me...I'm trying to be patient.

It's not working.

Shocker

OK, I think that was the best Veronica Mars episode of the season. I don't even know what else to say. It was just so good. Here's some stuff that I thought was interesting:

• Something is seriously weird with Woody Goodman. That workout room scene with him and Logan was just bizarre. Is he gay? (I can't be the only person that thought that.) Is he responsible for the bus accident? Is he gay and responsible for the bus accident? Keith has that footage from Goodman's house now. Since Goodman wanted it back so badly, it must have some sort of clue on it. Oh, maybe it doesn't have anything to do with Goodman. Maybe there is some sort of scandal involving his super annoying daughter. I seriously do not like her (and neither does Logan, hehe).
• There was a lot of couple stuff this episode. I am really sad for Mack and Beaver. They were such a cute couple, but they were taken away from us so quickly (though I have a suspicion from previous episodes that Beaver is scheming something, so maybe Mack is better off keeping a distance from him.) I wonder what's up with Beaver anyway. It seems like it is about more than just his lack of experience. Poor Mack looked so heartbroken when he dumped her. Then there was the Wallace, Jackie and Jane triangle. I have to say, Jackie has proven herself to have a lot of integrity. Wallace was just plain wrong, but he was just being a normal teenage guy. At least he did end up doing the right thing by breaking up with Jane, but good for Jackie for not immediately taking him back. She is trying to be a better person and she is trying to show people that she is a better person than they think she is. She does not need that break up on her conscience. I also wanted to point out that Jackie's asking Charlie to the dance was very reminiscent of Lindsey asking Eli to the dance in the Freaks and Geeks pilot, a show Rob Thomas is admittedly a huge fan of. And in final couple news, there were definite sparks between Logan and Veronica when they danced. I think there may have even been an almost kiss. I don't know how I feel about this, but it was worth pointing out. I didn't really believe that those two were done with eachother anyway. I actually really liked the Logan and Hannah relationship though, and I do think that that will be revisited at some point as well.
• Logan was in fine form this episode. (Except when he was wearing another argyle sweater. Did he decide to start wearing the clothes that Duncan left behind? The Slacker t-shirt and blazer combo was much better.) I loved that he won the essay contest by stealing lines from Easy Rider. I'm just curious as to what his new scheme is. I do not believe that he would even bother with the essay contest without some ulterior motive. Unless the contest was mandatory participation. I wasn't clear on that. Anyway, I sincerely believe that he has bigger plans for that Woody Goodman signature stamp than commandeering Lamb's parking space. However, I could see how messing with Lamb could be a noble cause in and of itself.
• Weevil. Weevil. Weevil. If only he had had a little more patience. I cannot say that I don't understand why he did what he did though. It really seemed as though Lamb not only did not care to listen to Weevil and Veronica and their evidence, but that he had no interest in actually finding Felix's killer. Still, I'm a fan of the whole due process thing. Also, I can't help but think that Thumper's death is going to come back to haunt them all later, and that he possibly died knowing something about the bus accident.
• The end. Chilling.

Overall, just a truly amazing episode that utilized so many characters so well and advanced every plot. I am not surprised in the least that this show could produce such and astounding episode, but that does not make me any less appreciative.

Finally, with regard to last week's episode, I have a prediction for season 3. The big season 3 mystery will be the rapes at Hearst College. Now everyone watch next Tuesday at 9 o'clock so that we get a season 3. Note the schedule change. Don't forget.

Oh, Milton, You're So Fine...

What? Everyone else has used that tired joke. It's my turn.

Anyway, I realized over the weekend that I completely left out any of the Brainiac action from my review of last week's Smallville episode, "Hypnotic." I couldn't imagine how I could possibly make such a huge oversight. The Brainiac stuff was clearly the best stuff about the episode. Then I realized why I would leave it out. For one thing, there was nothing to rant and complain about. Anybody who knows me knows that I would much rather talk about a show that is pissing me off than one that I fined little to criticise about (which is why I don't talk about Veronica Mars very often -- it's too good.) However, the far bigger reason was because it seemed like it was a completely different episode than the one with HypnoHo -- a better episode from a better show. Hell, when I saw the opening I though I might have stumbled upon an early season X-Files episode. It was that cool, and also pretty creepy.

The Lex and Professor Fine interaction was great, as was to be expected. Nevertheless, I almost felt bad for Lex when he confidently proclaimed that he knew that Fine was actually a government agent, though I guess it's a good thing that he was so far off since getting it right would have meant getting speared through the frontal lobe. Brainiac is clearly playing Lex now and I cannot wait to see what comes of it. I loved that Fine planted the idea of a possible alien invasion. If you wil recall, when Clark was hallucinating in Professor Fine's office during Splinter, he imagined Lex addressing a group of people about Clark being the first wave of a possible invasion. I have high hopes that they will actually go somewhere with this (and that it might tie back into Lex's season three notion that Segeeth -- the Naman's nemesis from the cave paintings -- is actually the hero).

I also want to comment on how good Michael Rosenbaum and James Marsters are opposite eachother. So many of Lex's scenes have been with Lana lately, it is really nice to see him working against an actor that can challenge him. And since both actors have a habit of getting A games out of lesser actors, what they get out of eachother should be fun to watch. I really look forward to seeing this team up of both the characters and the actors.

Brainiac's final scene was the most intriguing. He oozes out of the ship, like he did in the season premier, only this time there are 4 of him (no idea why the 4 Brainiacs are clothed while the 1 was naked). Then one of them says "We need more samples," and all 4 speed off in opposite directions. I assume that he is refering to collecting more samples of the ebola-like disease he got in the opening scene. Perhaps this is part of a plan to rid Earth of humanity with a supervirus. I am also curious as to whether he is in Honduras because it is a good place to collect disease samples or because of its Kryptonian significance. It was mentioned in "Transference" that the Water stone, which allowed Lionel to swap bodies with Clark, was found in Honduras. Perhaps Slavkin & Swimmer, who wrote both episodes, just like Honduras. As this is Smallville, we may never know.

"Clark, you're hypnotized. How else could you throw me across the room?"

I wasn't initially going to comment on this week's Smallville, even though it was the first one in weeks and it had Professor Fine, but with a line like that I had to. In a word, it was the awesomest line ever. It just so neatly exemplifies the kind of crap we are expected to swallow week after week. Every time Clark uses his superpowers in front of Lex, we are supposed to believe that Lex is going to accept the lame ass excuses Clark gives him, not to mention Lana. Lionel used bizarre stone from Honduras to swap bodies with Clark, and it somehow gave Lionel (in Clark's body) superstrength. Clark was infected with some weird silver "meteor rock" that no one ever saw before. It made him paranoid and gave him superstrength and speed. Clark was hypnotized by some skank. Guess what. It gave him superpowers. Did it give any of the other people who got hypnotized superpowers? Uh, no. Wow. Interesting. That couldn't possibly mean that Clark had superpowers to begin with. No, of course not.

As far as I'm concerned, there is no reason why Lex should still be investigating Clark, which he apparently is since he told Simone that she wasn't just supposed to break Clark and Lana up (belch) but also find out if there was anything unusual about Clark. He should already know that Clark has freaking superpowers. Lex, just move on to whatever you are planning on doing once you found out whether or not Clark has superpowers. Seriously, enough is enough.

Also in this episode, Clark and Lana broke up for the 500th time. Apparently this time it's forever. Oh how I wish I could believe that. Hearing Clark tell Chloe "My power to hurt Lana is greater than all my powers combined," was just painful. Clark, you stopped a missile. Hurting Lana somehow outweighs saving thousands of lives. OK then. I will say this though, Kristin Kreuk actually managed to give a good performance this week. I might have actually had some sympathy for Lana if : 1) she didn't use the same "Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't still love me" line that she used on Jason last season (maybe she has her own powers of hypnosis); 2) she didn't immediately go running off to her back up boyfriend, Lex; and 3) they didn't have Chloe and Martha go on about how Clark has given Lana reason to hate him. What kind of bullshit is that? Lots of people get dumped. Eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's and get over it. And why would that be such a big deal anyway? Martha made that comment about hoping Lana didn't do anything they would all regret, which made absolutely no sense to me. (But then, I haven't understood why Martha suddenly went from being Lana's #1 fan to going on about how maybe she's not the one for Clark.) I'm just going to assume that Martha and Chloe are so concerned about Lana hating Clark because they have secretly feared her for years. It makes sense. She wore that freaking necklace for years. She should be a krypto freak herself by now. Or have cancer. In the comic books, didn't Lex get cancer from the kryptonite ring that he wore?

Here's what I did like: Chloe saving the day. It was actually pretty believable and not too contrived. It was completely in character for her to have faith in Clark and believe he was mindwhammied. Considering she knows that the Kents store random pieces of kryptonite around just in case, I find it reasonable that she would do the same. Her finding all that info about Simone and the crystal were the most implausible parts, but she's been doing that since season 1. Her reaction to knocking out Martha was awesome too. Very cute. I also liked seeing Clark knock Lois out. She was annoying and it shut her up. He should do that more often. Why was she even in this episode?

I guess this episode was pretty entertaining though. I pretty much enjoyed it while I was watching it. It was amusing. Unfortunately, I think most of the comedy was unintentional. There was one huge missed opportunity in this episode. When Clark saw Simone's crystal, he should have said "Oooo. Shiny," thereby completing his transformation into The Tick.

Soundtrack Moments That Hijacked My Brain

I know I have a lot of commentary to catch up on. There were new episodes of Veronica Mars and Lost last week, and I have several comic books that I wanted to talk about. I just didn’t feel like catching up on that today. That sort of thing has kind of hijacked the blog, and that’s not really what I intended when I started, so I figure that I would do something a little different tonight. Also, I am going to start making each entry specific to one topic, so that they are shorter. This means that I may post more than one entry at a time, but I think overall it will be better.

Earlier today I was thinking about how sometimes a movie or television show chooses a song so well, that any time you hear that song you immediately think of the scene from whatever movie or television show used the song. With that in mind, here’s a list, in no particular order, of soundtrack moments that hijacked my brain:

“At This Moment” by Billy Vera and the Beaters from Family Ties: You remember the scene. Tracy Pollan’s character Ellen Reed is leaving to go back home to her boyfriend. Alex P. Keaton goes to the bus station to try and stop her. He asks her not to go, but she kisses him goodbye and leaves anyway. And this song plays. It’s a heartbreaking scene, and even though Tracy Pollan was not on the show very long, Ellen Reed was always the girl that it seemed like Alex should be with. Courtney Cox’s character was on the show for at least a full season, but for some reason, she just wasn’t as good. I blame this scene, and this song. (Not to mention the very real chemistry between Michael J. Fox and Tracy Pollan. They are married in real life after all.) It was a very powerful moment. I was very young when I saw it, but I remember it made me cry. And it did the same thing when I saw this episode in reruns. I could be mistaken, but I am pretty certain that this scene made the song a hit. I can understand why. Every once in a while, I hear this song on the radio and cannot help but think of poor Alex P. Keaton, left at the bus station by the woman he loves.

“Don’t Know Much About History” by Sam Cooke from Witness: I know I am not alone on this one. The scene, of course, is when Harrison Ford is trying to fix his car in the barn. He finally gets it to work when Kelly McGillis comes into the barn. He puts on the radio, this song plays, and they dance. Then they are interrupted by the old Amish guy. The whole scene is very sweet. It’s a really good thing that the movie and the scene are so great because the song is great. It’s Sam Cooke, how could it not be? I mostly hear this song in supermarkets, so I am actually grateful for the pleasant images it brings to mind. I’m also thankful I have something to associate this song, which I really love, with beyond supermarkets.

“Wild Horses” by The Sundays from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: I don’t like it when singers and/or bands cover songs that I really love. And I think it is an especially bad idea to go and cover a song by a band like The Rolling Stones. Given that information, you will find it as no surprise that I disliked this version of “Wild Horses” for years. Then the Buffy the Vampire Slayer season 3 episode, “The Prom,” aired. Now I love it. Buffy had just received her well deserved Class Protector Award from the Sunnydale students. She’s so happy, but then she’s left alone with her award and her punch while everyone else goes off to dance with their dates. Then this song begins to play and Angel walks through the gym doors, looking amazing in a tux, after having broken up with her earlier in the episode. I just can’t help but think of Buffy finally getting her perfect high school moment whenever I hear it. It makes me happy, but it makes me sad too. The moment can’t last. Angel has only come because he knows how important the prom was to Buffy. They are still broken up and he is still leaving Sunnydale. That’s why the song is so perfect. It’s about the importance of the moment and being there in that moment for the person that you love. But I think the female voice and the even more maudlin tone of The Sundays’ cover make it uniquely suited for this scene. The fact that the female voice is so perfect, given that the song is clearly representative of Angel’s point of view, is just one of those uniquely Buffy things. Even though the voice of the show is that of Joss Whedon’s, the voice of the show was still always female. Whedon just has a talent for that. Also, in the previous season, the episode “I Only Have Eyes for You,” Angel was also given a female voice when he was possessed by the female teacher who had an affair with the male student that possessed Buffy.

“Hurt” by Johnny Cash from Smallville: Normally, songs from Smallville have nothing but bad connotations for me. After all the Clark/Lana barn scenes, and one unfortunate pre-sex scene, it is truly amazing that I still love Coldplay and the new Depeche Mode songs. And then there are all the overly praising songs of Lana and her beauty. I have not been able to listen to my Maroon 5 CD since “She Will Be Loved” appeared in a season 4 episode, and while I used to tolerate that Lifehouse song and James Blunt’s “You’re Beautiful,” I simply can’t anymore. Somehow it doesn’t have the same effect when the scene is a great moment between Lionel and Lex Luthor. (Also, I know I said I have problems with cover songs, and I love Nine Inch Nails as much as I love The Rolling Stones, but that just doesn’t apply to Johnny Cash.) The scene, from the season 3 episode “Shattered,” is great. Lionel has drugged Lex and elaborately set up attempts on his life, then covered them up so that everyone will think that Lex was having paranoid delusions. Clark tried to help, but Lex was carted off to the asylum anyway. The final scene is of Lex in a padded cell wearing a straight jacket, completely out of his mind. Lionel stands there, looking in on his son through the two way mirror. Clearly, in his warped way, he loves his son and regrets the fact that he had to do this to him. Johnny Cash’s “Hurt” plays over it all, a perfect song for such an oddly touching moment.

There are other songs and other scenes, but I think this is a good enough list for now. Maybe at some point I will compile a sequel to this list. For now, if anyone is actually reading this, I would love to hear if other people have and similar song and scene pairings that they just can’t separate.

A Second Look at Smallville's 100th Episode

I know I said in my last entry that I wasn't going to do much commentary for a while, But I actually wrote this a while ago and am just getting around to putting it up now, so this doesn't count. It's just that the 100th episode, "Reckoning," was rerun last Thursday making it a good time to say something about it. And I wanted to get it out of the way before new episodes started to air this Thursday.

Anyway, my initial response to "Reckoning" and Clark's actions in the episode have softened quite a bit. I've often said that Reckoning is the type of episode that seems really well done on the surface, but when you look closely, it's really a piece of crap.

I do think that Clark believed that he could keep anyone from dying, but not a lot of that is represented in the episode itself. (Apparently there was a deleted scene where Clark brought Jonathan's body to the Fortress of Solitude in an attempt to get Jor-El to save him. The inclusion of this scene would have at least made it seem like Clark is made an effort.) But I also believe that Clark just didn't think. It just seems like he should be too far along to still be jumping into things without thinking, especially in his dealings with Jor-El who may often be vague but can never be accused of not following through on his threats.

It's really the whole premise of the episode that's the problem. Time travel, reversing death, trading a life for a life. It was all just too big and unnecessary. And honestly, Jonathan Kent's death was completely unnecessary.

What pisses me off, is that Clark's resurrection in "Hidden" should have been the perfect time for him to reevaluate everything in his life. Had he not been brought back, with his powers, then the whole town would have been destroyed and thousands of innocent people would have been killed, including his loved ones. They could have easily had him realize that at the end of the episode and realize just how important he is and his powers are. He could have, and should have started to embrace his superheroing future right then and there. There still would have been plenty of angst on the Clark/Lana front and Clark would still have had to deal with the fact that he rather enjoyed being normal.

Instead, they had to go with the whole life exchange BS so that all he could focus on was that and not the fact that the world is actually better for having him in it. And quite frankly, given how many lives Clark saved in that episode alone, the exchange of one life for his, whomever that life ended up being, was well worth it.

"Reckoning" was about TPTB having a main character die purely for the sake of having a main character die in the 100th episode. I just can't get behind that as a good thing, no matter how well the episode itself was executed.

Sometimes, The Internet Sucks

First of all, I already wrote a really long post that I totally lost. Stupid internet. Now I have to rewrite almost the whole thing. Well, here goes...

Veronica Mars: Oh Veronica, how I have missed you. It's been 6 weeks, but it seems like 6 years. OK, enough of that. It was another really strong episode. I could have done without the chick from Laguna Beach, but compared to Paris Hilton, she's freaking Meryl Streep. I didn't think the mystery of the week was as good as others, but it's always good to see Veronica helping the outsiders. We see her do quite a few unethical things, so it's always good to see that she uses her powers for good. I'm far more comfortable with Logan and Hannah now. Maybe it's because the relationship has been placed in such ambiguous territory. I don't know whether I think Logan was lying or not when he said that he didn't know who Hannah's father was when he met her at the fair, but I will say that she's certainly Logan's type. Guy likes petite blondes, and I think if we get to know Hannah more, she might turn out to be pretty tough. I guess part of me is rooting for the couple a little bit. Huh. Who knew? Veronica is so going to let him have it though, so I'm thinking we might actually get a better idea of where Logan really stands. Also in this episode, Cooke was exonerated and then further implicated. Personally, I think the fact that the explosives seem to point mostly towards Cooke pretty much exonerates him right there. It's too early in the season. If I were Keith and Veronica, I'd be looking into Woody Goodman. It was his hangar after all. Finally, is it wrong that I love Sheriff Lamb? I guess, to be more accurate, I love to hate him. I'm actually surprised that he didn't back down. I guess Cooke is going to be spending some time in jail. Wonder if he'll share a cell with Aaron Echolls. I do hope Veronica and Keith don't go to Lamb about the explosives. If they do, the investigation will be over and Cooke will get railroaded, even more than he already is. Wait. What am I talking about? Since when do the Marses bring something to the police that they can deal with so much better on their own? Thank God Neptune has them, otherwise the jails would be filled with innocent people.

Bones: Adam Baldwin! I love him. But you already know that. First thing's first though. David Boreanaz is adorable. As much as I would prefer to have Angel back, he's perfect as Seely Booth. It's so nice to see him in a role where he gets to joke around and smile, and the Foreigner scene illustrated that perfectly. Pure Boreanaz. But I have to admit, there was a bit of Angel in this episode too, particularly when he was all jealous over Bones's internet date. Speaking of her date, they were supposed to meet at a restaurant named Nolita. That was the same name as the restaurant in Kitchen Confidential. Nice shout out to a good show that was cancelled before its time, and yet another Whedonverse connection as it co-starred Nicholas Brendon. But back to Adam Baldwin. It wasn't a great role, but I have to give him credit for not betraying any of the character's ultimately sinister intentions. No mustache twirling for him. He's too good for that. The episode did leave me with a question though. What was up with hearing Henry Fonda's monologue from The Grapes of Wrath at the end? It didn't really seem to fit with the episode, though I suppose its intention was as a general comment on the characters. Whatever. I don't even think The Grapes of Wrath was the movie that we saw on the television screen, at least it wasn't that scene.

Justice League Unlimited: I forgot to comment on this last weekend. I won't go into too much detail about it now, but, as usual, I loved it. And as usual, the Whedonverse is well represented among the voice talent with Juliet Landau as Tala, Gina Torres as Vixen, Morena Baccarin as Black Canary, and Amy Acker as The Huntress. The Huntress is one of my favorites. She's so cool, and she and The Question make the best couple. So, with that in mind, here's a bit of my favorite quotage:

The Question: AHA! Just as I suspected. 32 flavors.

The Huntress: There's something wrong here, Q. I can feel it.

The Question: I'm the conspiracy theorist, and even I don't see anything.

The Huntress: So, what are you wearing?

The Question: Blue overcoat. Fedora.

The Huntress: You really suck at this.

The Question: Orange socks.

It's the orange socks that kill me. *sigh* I love The Question.

Finally, I leave you with a very important question. Whedonesque posted a link to a Buffy versus Batman poll. But as is usual with these polls, the most interesting thing is what people have to say about it, including Joss Whedon himself (just scroll down). (The dirty tease doesn't give anything away though.) Regarding his comments, I'd just like to say, it's not that my priorities are out of place. It's just that I'm still contemplating the great caveman versus astronaut debate. But to turn my attention to the question at hand, my initial instinct was that Batman would win no contest. But then I put some more thought into it and there are just too many variables. Why are they fighting? Is it just to see who would win? Is Buffy somehow trying to protect Dawn? Is it Buffy before or after she died? Is it pre or post crisis Batman? Is it Frank Miller's Batman? Do they have any prior knowlege of eachother before the meet in battle? Are they using weapons and/or gadgets? What about magic? Does Buffy think Batman is hot? I just need to know more details before I draw any conclusions.

OK, I am finally done. For the second time. Now I am off to watch the episode of Supernatural I recorded, much later than originally intended. But there's really no better way to end a long day than by watching pretty boys battle the occult.

Playing Catch Up

Since I didn't update over the weekend, and then posted on the Oscars last night, today's update is pretty varied. Here goes...

Justice League Unlimited: First things first. I am really pissed with myself because I accidentally erased this one from my DVR when I finished watching it. And I loved The Great Brain Robbery. I had been waiting for this episode for a really long time and it absolutely did not disappoint. Had I not been an idiot, I probably would have already watched it for a third time by now. Sure the set up for the brain swap was really hokey, but the pay off was totally worth it. Clancy Brown did a wonderful job of getting the Flash's tone down perfectly. And kudos to Michael Rosenbaum for not sounding like Smallville's Lex Luthor. I think we learned quite a bit about Flash and Lex in this episode too. Flash, for instance, is way more powerful than we realized. I'm just not sure if we are supposed to think that Lex could tap into all that power because he is so smart and figured out how to do this stuff with his knowledge of science, or if the Flash knows he can do this stuff and just doesn't because it is too dangerous. Too bad the show is getting cancelled and we probably will never get to explore this issue. Also, Lex isn't a very attentive lover. That and he doesn't inspire a lot of confidence as a leader among the rest of the Legion. Polaris especially is keen to take over. (Fun fact: Michael Rosenbaum did double duty in this episode as he voiced Polaris too.) Now that Lex has control of his body again, I have no doubt that he will be able to quell all attempts to usurp him, not to mention get the information he needs to reunite with Brainiac. I'm still pulling for those two crazy kids to get back together. And now for my favorite moments:

When asked if he's going to wash his hands before leaving the bathroom, Flash as Lex responds "No, because I'm evil."

Flash as Lex constantly referring to himself as Lex Luthor.

"Am you Bizarro mommy?"

"Heeey! That's not restful."

Lex as Flash defending himself in the commissary with utensils and then food, speeding off, then coming back for a snack.

Lex as Flash pulling off his mask to reveal Flash's secret identity only to realize "I have no idea who this guy is."

Basically, I love Flash. I love Lex. All the moments were pretty awesome.

American Idol: I didn't really intend to ever post about this, but I had to. Why? MANDISA!!!! She is awesome. Seriously. I love her. I think either Melissa and Kinnik are going home, though my just general dislike for Melissa may be coloring that. I don't know why I don't like her, but I do know that if you are going to perform a Heart song, you better nail it. She just didn't. Also, I really like Kellie, but you should not perform "I'm the Only One" unless you have once had your heart ripped from your chest, had a huge chunk taken out of it, had it put back in your chest and then you decided to go back for more. 'Cause that song requires some actual emotion. There has to be some pain to back it up. Kellie knows nothing of pain, which is what makes her so adorable, but also why she shouldn't be singing that song.

House: Dude! Howard Hesseman was the disease of the week. Remember Head of the Class? I loved that show. And Adam Busch (aka Warren from Buffy the Vampire Slayer aka the asshole who killed Tara and then got all his flesh ripped off his body by evil Willow) is a cow lover, but not. He's really just into his stepmom, ala Bill S. Preston, Esq. Man, the people on this show are freaky. Who would claim to be a cow lover when they weren't? Oh, there's Greg Grunberg too! I love him. I miss Weiss on Alias. He's going to be in a pilot, called Heroes that sounds really good though. Sort of a superhero thing meets Lost. Ooooo, and he not only called House an ass, but he punched him too. I love Dr. House, but sometimes he really deserves that. His performance was very good too.

Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man: It was better than the previous 4 issues. Hopefully now that "The Other" is over, Peter David can get into his own thing and tell some interesting stories. I'm just not sure if this is it. But it was better.

Infinite Crisis #5: Since I'm not really a big reader of DC Comics, so I don't understand half of what's going on in this mini series. But I am enjoying it. Frankly, I thought Earth 2 Lois's death was very touching. I think everything that Kal-L has done, misguided and naive as going along with Alexander Luthor's plan to restore Earth 2 might be, made sense when he held her dying body his arms and said "Superman always saves Lois Lane." When you think about it, that is pretty much an absolute truth of his life. So when Alexander Luthor tells him that Lois isn't dying because of old age and that she can be saved, of course this would seem reasonable to him. Then add that to the fact that he has, quite naturally as most people do this of their home, idealized his memory of Earth 2. It's really heartbreaking. Who I can't really understand is Alexander Luthor. I understand that he wants to find the perfect Earth, I just don't really get why. And after the Superman vs. Superman fight, I think Kal-L got some sense knocked into him. Kal-El's line "If your from this Earth it can't be perfect. Because a perfect Earth doesn't need a Superman," hit him really hard. He gets it now. And I think he's going to go kick some gold-clad Luthor butt. I did think that the deux ex machina of Earth 2 Wonder Woman was a bit much. But then there's Superboy Prime. He accidentally knocks off one person's head and suddenly he's a psychotic freak. And it's all because he's a whiny, jealous little bitch. You'd think he was Smallville's Clark. Aren't Superboy fans going to be a bit upset by this? Or are they all to old to care now? On a final note, a flare for garish outfits must be a dominant trait in the Luthor genetic makeup. Alexander Luthor is still sporting his unbelievably awesome gold suit that he has had since Crisis on Infinite Earths. My love for this costume knows no bounds. But in addition to Alex's snazzy duds, Lex Luthor is sporting his Superfriends outfit. It looks good on him. Sadly, Earth 1 Superboy seems to have missed out on the gene. Dude wears jeans. What the hell?

Ultimates 2 #10: Could they actually give us a better issue than 9? Apparently they can. Tony Stark is so cool. I love that he can download the info from Natasha's brain. Paranoid indeed. And he's just so cool about the whole thing. I bet he's going to need a drink though. Then there is Hawkeye. Is what he did with his fingernails even possible? How much force would you need to flick you fingernails with to actually rip them off and send them shooting into someone's neck. Frankly, when I saw that, I thought I was going to throw up. I loved it. I can't wait to see Captain America kick some ass. They've messed with his girlfriend and his country. Things are not going to go well for the bad guys. Finally, I'm guessing that Thor is going to play a big part in the next, or at least the last, issue. Since Loki is behind all this, it's pretty safe to assume that Thor doesn't need that belt to get his power.

Books of Doom: I've been learning so much about super villainy from this series. How could I not? It is about the greatest super villain ever, Dr. Doom. Brubaker really is telling a great story, and this may be the best issue yet. Dr. Doom killed a yeti. That is so cool. He's also completely irrational. In issue #2, Reed Richards was completely inconsequential. Now Reed Richards is the architect of all Doom's failures. His suspicion is completely unfounded and totally born of jealousy. But that's the sort of thing that separates just normally eccentrics from super villains. That, and a utter disgust for humanity. You can't be a good super villain unless you have a real good superiority complex. Also, you totally don't need to get a doctorate. All that education is so unnecessary. You can just intimidate people into calling you doctor, though I suppose it is somehow reassuring to know that Dr. Doom didn't pass his boards or anything. And all this led to the armor. That was a truly awesome moment. My only complaint was that it should have ended with the panel of him lifting his hood and proclaiming himself DOCTOR DOOM. I feel like the rest could have waited.

The Oscars

I know my next update was supposed to be about comc books, but I'm just goint to get the Oscar talk out of the way before I get to the good stuff. Basically, they were pretty dull. Even the big Best Picture upset wasn't that huge a surprise, since everyone was talking about how Crash could be dark horse that beat Brokeback Mountain. Otherwise, if you saw any other award show this season, you already knew who won. There were some good moments though. Here's my commentary:

Jon Stewart did a great job as host and I hope they have him back. I especially liked the campaign commercials for Best Actress. And the gay cowboy montage was really funny. I loved the opening, with all the people they went to to host before the got Jon Stewart. The Steve Martin bit, with Letterman's callback to it later was especially good. Unfortunately, at that point I was watching on the tiny television in the kitchen, so I couldn't see very well. Did Mel Gibson shave his beard? He seemed to look a little less crazy man. Good to see that he maybe still has a sense of humor too. I thought Jon Stewart's opening monologue wasn't as funny as some of his jokes later on in the show, when he was sending up the ceremony a bit more (like the joke about the montage tribute to montages), but t was subtle and amusing. He had just the right balance of political humor without being overly political. My favorite joke of his was the Scientology conversion joke that he came back to after a commercial break, but the audience did not laugh at all. Are they still worried about the wrath of Tom Cruise.

Clooney, as expected, gave the best speech. He's a charming guy. I haven't seen Syriana (and probably never will), but I suspect that he won mostly for getting fat. Award shows like that sort of thing. But I won't rule out the possibility that he gave a wonderful performance, despite never before showing signs of being anything more than a charismatic man. Anyway, aside from Paul Giamatti and Matt Dillon, I've already forgotten who else was nominated. Paul Giamatti is pretty much famous because he is overlooked, so I think winning actually would have been bad for him. I was kind of rooting for Matt Dillon, like I have all awards season, because I would like to see him in more good movies. He will never be as good an actor as he was when he was a teenager, but he's still better than Herbie: Fully Loaded. Ultimately, Clooney doesn't need an Oscar, between the fact that he is George Clooney and the fact that he produces (an now writes and directs), he just makes his own quality projects. But Matt Dillon never would have given a good acceptance speech. I would say that Reese Witherspoon's speech was probably the worst, but that could just be because she annoys me, as does her pointy chin. I have to ask, how many times can a person use the phrase "real woman" in a speech before it gets obnoxious? My guess would be zero.

The presenter patter was typically bad, which is wh I'm giving full credit to Ben Stiller, Will Ferrell and Steve Carrell and Lily Tomlin ad Meryl Streep for being entertaining. I think I would have liked to see an Oscar presented by no one though. Just a gold statue floating in te air. As far as I could tell, the only really hideous outfits were worn by Naomi Watts and Carlize Theron. No clue what they were thiking. I felt bad for Lauren Bacall, she couldn't read the teleprompter and she just didn't look well. She was shaking. It was just bad and had me wondering when we would be seeing her in the In Memorium category. Speaking of Lauren Bacall, what was up with the montages? They were just random, and a bit overly self congratulatory. They had the montage about the biopics (appropriately presented by Russell Crowe, who I was really surprised to see) and I don't think they included American Splendor, so Paul Giamattie managed to get overlooked even when there wasn't an award to be handed out. I loved the fact that Samuel L. Jackson presented the montage about all the "issue" movies, considering his next movie will be Snakes on a Plane. (Are you looking forward to that as much as I am? I don't know about you, but that's a high concept I can get behind.)

I thought it was pretty cool that the hip hop song won for Best Song, just because that moment was so un-Oscar. But Dolly Parton's performance was the only one tat didn't scare me, so I sort of feel like the song from Transamerica should have won. I never appreciated the simplicity of Dolly Parton (who knew she had any?) until I saw the performance of the song from Crash. The mothers of the two people who were reenacting the frisking scene from the movie mst have been so proud when they were informed that their children would be doing that on national television. There was a burning car though, which I enjoyed.

And it all ended with Jack being Jack. I think they asked him to present this year just to ensure that the best reaction shot in the biz would be back in his front row seat, grinning like crazy no matter what the joke. (And rather creepily seated next to Keira Knightley.) He should rightfully present every year though, since The Oscars are really his show.

Creepy, But Not As Creepy As Tom Cruise

First of all, tonight's episode of Smallville was "Splinter," which was a really great one. It had Professor Fine, so that's just a few extra points there. Whatever my problems with this show, I have to be grateful that they put James Marsters back on my television. Unfortunately, no scenes between James Marsters and Michael Rosenbaum in these one. They are so good on screen together. But considering how good both these guys are at making lesser actors look good, it's not surprising that they would bring the best out in eachother. What we do get is Tom Welling acting all crazy and menacing. He is so good at that. And with the spooky vibe of the episode and the Hitchcockian music, I couldn't help but think of Chloe as a classic Hitchcock blonde, especially with those classic looking suits she wears. Anyway, "Splinter" was a good episode and worth a second watching. I guess "Solitude" is next week, which is another good one -- more James Marsters.

Speaking of really good Smallville, if you want to see some, or if you're tired of dangling plot lines from previous seasons, check out The Vengeance Chronicles . They are like the Chloe Chronicles from a few seasons back, but less Chloe and more of that Angel of Vengeance chick. It's good though, with continuity galore. I'm talking the return of Molly Griggs and 33.1, which is the biggest dangling plotline of all time. I really hope these things wind up having an impact on the show, because Lex is behind some serious shit. I don't see how Chloe could not bring Clark in on this. Also, she's going to get one hell of a story out of this. Here's my question though: isn't Lois Lane the one who is supposed to try and bring Lex Luthor down with her journalistic muckraking? Oh wait, Chloe Sullivan is Lois Lane on Smallville. I forgot.

And now on to other stuff...

Lost: Finally we get some relevant flashbacks that actually provide us with new information that ties into the plot. It was a good episode. William Mapother brought back his special brand of creepy (though still not as creepy as his cousin) in a reappearance by the Ethan Rohm character. Man he doped Claire up real good. I couldn't help but wonder how all those sedatives didn't wind up having some negative effect on baby Aaron. Were we supposed to be surprised that Rousseau's baby was a girl? Because I called that last season when we found out her baby was named Alex. Also, Zeke isn't really bearded. I don't know why that is significant, but I am certain that it is. Maybe it has something to do with the Wizard of Oz. A sort of "Don't look behind that curtain" thing. I dunno. I'm grasping at straws. But I know the Wizard of Oz has something to do with something on this show. Henry Gale, the guy they are keeping prisoner in the hatch, is the same name as Dorothy's uncle. And the other week he said that he and his wife were going around the world in a hot air balloon when they crashed on the island. The Wizard crashed in Oz in a hot air balloon. I'm more certain than ever that Henry Gale is an Other, so I really do think that the Wizard of Oz is a clue to what the deal is with them. Maybe Lost is a metaphor for our nation's political and economic situation. I suppose Henry could be trying to pit Locke against Jack in order to create an opening for his escape, but I think that is he was just a guy who crashed on the island and his wife died, he'd be a lot more scared than he is. And there's that smile that he gave Sayid the other week. That just screamed "I am an Other." Speaking of Others, I don't trust Libby. Just don't. No concrete evidence that she is evil as of yet. I am a little confused by Locke getting all pissy about Jack being in charge. Wasn't he the one who told Jack to lead them last season? Next new episode is March 22.

Supernatural: This episode actually had a bunch of touching moments and those shadow demons were pretty scary. When this show is on, it is really on. I just wish Meg was played by a better actress. I think she'd be a really cool adversary for the Winchester boys if I could just stop thinking about how much the actress sucks. And I love, love, love the Winchester boys. All three of them. I just really get that family vibe off of them. It broke my heart a little when Dean said he just wanted the three of them to be together again, and Sam told him that when this was over he had to let him go back to his life. I feel so bad for Dean, because aside from the short period of time before his mother died which he probably can't remember all that well, the years before Sam left to go to school were the happiest times he'd ever known. His father and Sam got to experience a normal life. I can't help but feel that someday he's going to be hunting demons all alone, not knowing what else to do with himself. Sam's reunion with his father was quite good as well. They earned that hug, and it was really nicely played. My heart broke again when Dean realized that their dad had to go off by himself because being around them puts him in too much danger. He came so close to getting what he wants. My latest fear is that, after Papa Winchester made such a big deal about how close he is to killing the thing that killed their mother and Jess, that he is going to die before he is able to share everything with the boys. That will drag things out for longer. On a shallow note, I normally get pretty annoyed when TV shows beat the crap out of their characters and really cut them up good and then the next time you see them they are completely recovered with no bruises or scars or anything, but I don't think I'd mind too much if they did that on Supernatural. I wouldn't want anything to interfere with the pretty. Also, thank god for the return of lascivious Dean. That girl he was supposed to be in love with several weeks back was so not worthy. Can't wait until this show moves to Thursday nights. That's going to be a pretty kick ass night of programming on The WB.

Veronica Mars: I think new episodes return on March 15. YAY! It was such a nasty tease when they promised a new episode and then didn't show one. But I'm all for them showing them when they think it will attract the most viewers. Anything to keep the show on the air.

Without A Trace: Martin's pain killer addiction would be so much more interesting if I didn't see it on just about every show. Whenever someone on a TV show gets shot, or stabbed, or is otherwise the victim of violence and suffers to long lasting physical problems, they get addicted to painkillers. Whatever. I love Martin and I really wish they had done something more interesting with his character. But I guess I should just be happy that he's getting a storyline.

In the next update I'm going to talk about psychotic Superboy Prime and the awesome wardrobe choices of guys named Luthor, my love for Ultimate Tony Stark and Captain America, and, of course, Dr. Doom.

Life, Death, and Wardrobe Trouble

First of all, I'd like to say how sad the passing of Darren McGavin and Don Knotts. I know everyone has their favorite memories of these actors, but I will always remember them most for A Christmas Story and The Incredible Mr. Limpet respectively.

On a happier note, two of my favorite Whedonverse alumni celebrated birthdays in the past week. Alexis Denisof celebrated his 40th birthday on February 25. (I had no idea he was that old. Not that 40 is old, just older than I thought he was.) And Adam Baldwin celebrated his 44th birthday on February 27th.

Speaking of Adam Baldwin, he's going to appear on Bones on March 15. Hopefully either Veronica Mars or Lost will be a repeat that night so I get to see it. Fortunately for David Boreanaz, Adam will be playing a fellow FBI agent and not an evil, invulnerable lawyer. I'm sure he will still be badass though. He's also been cast in a new pilot for ABC, and posted on the official Firefly board. He knows from good creative teams, so I have high hopes. His costar is Taye Diggs. Now, I love Taye Diggs, but I have to question having the 5'10" actor (and frankly, I didn't even think he was that tall) star opposite the 6'4" Adam Baldwin. I guess he's going to be standing on a lot of boxes. But they are both really talented, not to mention attractive, so I hope the pilot gets picked up and is really good. Either one of them on their own would get me to at least give a show a chance, so the two of them definitely puts it into must see TV territory.

And now on to some commentary...

Justice League Unlimited: Do you know why I was disappointed in this episode? It's because normally JLU is so good at making me immediately love, or at least really interested in, characters that I had no prior knowledge of. Patriot Act just didn't pull that off. First of all, Stargirl already annoyed me the first time we saw her this season, in that episode wit Supergirl. I just don't like the teeny bopper heroes. They are too much like the teeny bopper starlets. And Vigilante's main appeal is still the fact that he is voiced by Nathan Fillion (who still isn't the huge movie star he deserves to be), but Shining Knight was fairly interesting. I loved their conversation at the beginning about Dirty Harry. Green Arrow was also in this episode, and frankly, I didn't think there was enough of him. And why is Green Arrow's former sidekick named Speedy? What does speed have to do with archery? And did he seem kind of gay to anyone else? Mostly, I think the biggest flaw was that despite all the obvious heroism of the characters, the message that these characters deserve as much respect as the like of Superman even though they don't have powers and aren't as well known kind of got lost in the fact that they got their asses saved by a little old lady.

Astonishing X-Men #13: Oh, how I have missed this book. Joss Whedon and John Cassaday totally delivered too. It was obvious that Joss took note of fan criticism that the "Dangerous" arc didn't have enough character stuff. This was chock full of character stuff. I hope people who were angry with Joss for hitting the reset button on Emma Frost's evilness. I think it this issue made it pretty clear that helping the new Hellfire Club isn't really something she has much of a choice in. Personally, I'm a bit sick of the trend of making murderers good guys without them actually having to pay for their crimes, so I didn't care one way or another. I think the revelations regarding her character are interesting. Also, if that end shot wasn't the first time she wore Scott's "favorite outfit" for him, then I finally understand that relationship. I love Cyclops, but when it comes to Jean, he's a pretty sick freak. As for the Hellfire Club and Cassandra Nova, I'm going to have to do some research on them. The Hellfire Club was a bit before my time and the Cassandra Nova popped up while I was in college and not reading comics. But IGN Comics has a good article to help educate on the whole thing. And there is always Wikipedia. My favorite part of the issue was the Kitty and Piotr stuff. While I was familiar with the characters, I was not really familiar with their romantic relationship prior to the first 12 issues of Astonishing X-Men, but Joss Whedon got me so invested in it. You can't help but root for them to get together. I was totally surprised by how happy I was when he kissed her. I guess I now have to add them to the short list of fictional characters that I "ship." Sadly, it's a relationship being written by Joss Whedon, so you know the happiness can't last. Now that they are back together, Kitty will probably get shot.

Spider-Man: Finally, we turn to Spider-Man and his many wardrobe issues. In the same week that it is revealed that Spider-Man will be wearing the black costume in the third film, Spidey's new costume made its debut in Amazing Spider-Man #529. As far as the black costume goes, I have had several conversations on the issue at this point, and the overall consensus seems to be that the costume in the teaser poster, which is pretty much his normal costume only black, is not actually the costume he will be wearing in the movie. I have to say that I agree with this. I can't imagine that they would really give away what the symbiote costume will actually look like so early, especially given the fact that they haven't even confirmed that Venom will be appearing in the film yet.

The new costume in the comic books is far more troubling, if only because we know that it is the one we are going to be stuck with. It is quite simply put, hideous. And the less said about the legs it apparently sports the better. I was holding out hope that there would be a good plot driven reason for the new costume, but there really wasn't. And between putting him in Iron Man's colors and Tony Stark asking him to be his right hand man, it almost seems like Spider-Man is being turned into Iron Man's sidekick, or at least his lackey. Also, given the sheer number of costumed heroes in New York City, would a bunch of crooks necessarily recognize Spider-Man if he showed up in a completely different costume that wasn't even the same colors? I don't think they would.