A Desperate Plea to Hollywood

According to Variety, in an article found via Comic Book Resources, Warner Brothers has optioned a script for Thundercats, which is just the latest in a long line of 1980s nostalgia projects that are coming down the pipeline, starting with the increasingly cool looking Transformers movie being released next month. Personally, I'm an 80s kid and I love all these cartoons dearly, so I'm excited. Thundercats and He-Man particularly make me happy, since they have always been on my list of movies I would like to make if I were a filmmaker. (Everyone has one of those lists, right?) If Transformers is as big a movie as I expect it to be, I bet all these other cartoon themed projects will be rushed into production, and then we'll get a ton of 1980s cartoons and toy lines being optioned left and right, even the ones that absolutely suck. Then we'll get a bunch of movies that aren't actually tied to any 1980s nostalgia item, but are desperately trying to capitalize on the theme. Basically, I'm envisioning the comic book movie craze that happened after X-Men and Spider-Man, only with more robots. In the end, what started out really cool will become really lame and will make even hardcore geeks like me groan at the potential suckage and desecration of the heroes of our youth that Hollywood will trot out every summer. But before that happens, I have one request. Can we please, please, please have a She-Ra movie?

It's been really disappointing to me that She-Ra's been largely neglected in the whole nostalgia craze. A few years back when Thundercats and He-Man got comic book miniseries, I kept waiting for She-Ra, but it never happened. It didn't even seem like anyone even thought about it. This just completely amazes me, because I've been watching my She-Ra DVDs lately and it holds up the best out of all of them. I suppose it's the whole issue with female action hero thing that The Hollywood Reporter had an article on a couple of weeks ago, but I think if there was ever a property that had the potential changing that and being a real success, it would be She-Ra, possibly even more than Wonder Woman.

The whole storyline of the She-Ra series deals with so many of the issues that we already know resonate with people from the successes of other franchises. She-Ra is the champion of the rebel forces on the planet of Etheria who are trying to overthrow the evil Horde Empire. The similarities to Star Wars are self explanatory, and, of course, Lord of the Rings. It's a classic story, and one tat I think has a lot more potential than Thundercats, which, when watched as an adult, did not hold up nearly as well. Thundercats is basically the story of a handful of people (or cats, however you want to look at them) trying to defend themselves from Mumm-Ra, a villain with little motivation. The stakes aren't even very high there, with less than a dozen people on the entire planet. (Yes, I do know that more showed up later, but it hardly matched the oppression of an entire civilization.) She-Ra, as a character, is also a lot more interesting than He-Man. His alter ego, Prince Adam is over privileged and He-Man is a tool of the established government. Skeletor, the villain, is more of an under dog than he is, and he was cooler too. She-Ra, on the other hand, has the alter ego of Princess Adora, a competent heroine in her own right, and her backstory of having been raised by Hordak, the Horde ruler on Etheria, only to discover she had been deluded into believing she served a just ruler has a great deal of dramatic potential.

Basically, with She-Ra, a studio gets both a classic story in the vein of Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and even Harry Potter and a nostalgia property like Transformers, He-Man, and Thundercats. They should be all over that. Also, she's got a flying horse, a cool sword, really pretty hair, and her friends were all sorceresses and mermaids and ladies with wings. There is no bad in this concept. The fact that she's an excellent role model is just a bonus. Seriously, She-Ra is one of the greatest things ever. Hollywood needs to get on this.

Maybe if He-Man is a big success, they will want to do a spin off. That would make sense. I would even be OK with it if they wanted to make some minor changes. Some of the characters had hokey names, like Castaspella. I get why that might be a problem. And if producers think Bow should be a bit cooler and not so much of a damsel in distress (what's the male version of damsel?), it could work. I know I wouldn't mind seeing a Teela who does more than get captured in the He-Man movie. They just can't have Bow and She-Ra hook up. If they need a romantic interest, they can use Sea Hawk. He's a pirate, which just adds to the awesome factor and would give the movie an element of another proven Hollywood commodity. (The money making potential just keeps getting better and better.) However, if producers want to take She-Ra and make it into something that wouldn't be suitable for little kids, make her any less of the amazing role model that she was meant to be, or cast someone like Jessica Simpson, I'd rather they just not bother. I have no desire to see my childhood memories desecrated.